I have always thought this word was terribly abused, but didn’t really understand why until after the first time a known psychopath uttered it to me.

Most people associate respect with feelings for their parents.  This makes sense as our childhood is peppered with variants of ‘respect your elders.’  Through childhood emotional associations, the word gathers a new emotional sum in the metamind.  Logic can be overwhelmed with mandatory emotional recall of love and wisdom.  In the worst case respect can wrongly come to mean an act of the conscience itself.

In adulthood the word is not used that way.  It is used to establish rank.  A deviation among empathic humans, but not a catastrophic one.  To civilization, respect means variants of rank and division of labor and importantly the associated responsibility.  Respect is used to honor those who commit themselves to others.

Psychopaths can form alliances, but can’t commit to others in a selfless way.  Yet they love the word respect.  They love it’s logical connotation of rank and it’s emotional value of love and wisdom in empaths.  To them it defines a master-slave relationship, and is a tool for enforcing it.  When a psychopath tells you to respect him or her, they are telling you your rank.  They are identifying you as their slave.  To them phrases ‘show some respect’, and ‘how dare you do that to me!’ are variations of the same theme, blind obedience to your master.  Their position is master, of you.

Parents I know it is easy to fall back to order and rank and use the word respect with your children, but you are conditioning them to enslavement by clever psychopaths.  You are programing their conscience to be used against them.  Instead of emphasizing your command and control I humbly propose using consideration or considerate in it’s place.  Specifically associating accomplishment with how you treat other people.  Creating a pathway to bettering themselves not just in isolation, but with the societies on which we all depend.